Redirection Not Rejection

If you know me at all or are familiar at all with my story at all, I'm sure the fact that "rejection" is a topic I've chosen to write about is no surprise. If you're not familiar with my story and testimony, I'll clue you in: it has been shaped remarkably so by heavy rejection.

Fun fact about me: I knew I wanted to attend Lipscomb University (where I am currently in my junior year) since the summer after sixth grade. It is the only school I applied to and I actually skipped my senior year of high school at the prospect of being able to live out my biggest dream a whole year sooner than I had intended. You know how they say meeting your favorite celebrity is almost always a disappointment because they rarely live up to the way you have dreamt they would be. Well, having one dream all throughout middle school and high school and having meticulous expectations that I centered quite a bit of my identity around and then reality hitting was kind of like that, but on steroids.

Before I even came Lipscomb I was sure of the major I was pursuing, the social club I was going to rush, the student organizations I was going to join, the showy on-campus jobs I was going to have, the amazing friend group I was going to instantly fall into among many others things. So, when I finally got Lipscomb and application after application; interview after interview, I faced nothing but closed doors. Halfway through my first semester, I found myself in the middle of a very real identity crisis, it felt like the ground on which had been ripped out from below me.

What I was perceiving as cold, harsh rejection, in fact, was the Lord gently guiding me towards the path that he instead has set out for my life. God doesn't want to grant us the desires of our flesh, he wants to refine our desires and until he and his glory we long for. John Piper, a favorite teacher and author of mine, (and fellow Minnesotan) over his decades in theology and ministry has come to describe joy in the Christian life, as well as God purpose in it as "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in him"

For me, that season of 'rejection' was one that absolutely the most necessary thing in my life. I deeply needed humbling, I was calling myself a Christian, but profoundly suppressing the authority of my life I gave over to God.

Its written in Hebrews chapter twelve, verses 26-29,

"At that time his voice shook the earth, but now he has promised, “Once more I will shake not only the earth but also the heavens.”The words “once more” indicate the removing of what can be shaken—that is, created things—so that what cannot be shaken may remain. Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, for our “God is a consuming fire.”

Everything in my life shook painstakingly and without omission and my whole world was redirected back towards the Kingdom of God, it just took that level of refinement humbling and refinement. Had I not gone through this season of 'rejection', but what was really redirecting my path and refining my heart I would not be where I am now and I truly truly believe there is so much more joy in where I am now than the life I had wished for myself. My gratitude towards the Father for stepping so directly into my life and setting me on a better course exceeds what I have words for. He cares and loves for each and every one of us so completely its unimaginable. I in my flesh wanted one for me, but my father wanted something different, something abundantly more– abundantly more satisfying, abundantly more fruitful, abundantly more God-glorifying.

God set me on a path that was so much greater than the path I had said out for myself and it was all because of rejection.

Rejection is really just the manifestation of God destroying the wisdom of this world and redirecting us towards the power of God.